To all my sporadic readers of vickyism, hope you had a very Merry Christmas! And here's to a Happy New Year!
2005 has been an excellent year for me despite having to deal with a few annoying idiots here and there.
My great friend's younger brother passed away close to Christmas, and I was very sad. There is nothing like a death of a loved one to put life in perspective - and to remind you to never, ever sweat the small stuff.
Let the new year be a meaningful one for all, with more H2O, less fat, and more fibre. Let us live each day to the fullest, be kind to one another, and share with one another great forwarded emails.
I did many new things this year, which ranged from the most mundane to the most significant.
Some of my life's FIRSTS included these...road trip in the cold of January, experienced driving in snow for the first time, went sight seeing at many World Heritage places in Japan. Experienced salt-water onsen, saw the most amazing view of cherry blossoms. Climbed the Great Wall of China, visited Tianman Square. Climbed Mt. Fuji. Ate at Hard Rock Cafe. Had a "white birthday" in my 25years of life.
I also went home for 2 weeks. Went to Taiwan for my beautiful cousin's wedding. Attended 4 Japanese weddings.
I also joined a Dance team this year. Performed with them at many events and functions. Competed amongst 20 other dance groups on the street of the main city in the district, and came 3rd place. Plan to do more of it next year.
Some sad things that inevitably does happen in life...because of distance and different life styles, Mark and I made the right(?) decision to be on our own for a while (not the best decision I think, I miss him so much). Some of the best people that has made an impact on my life in left Japan to find another place to shine.
Next year, I resolve to do more exercise, learn more Japanese, dance more, laugh more and save more $$$
But, until then here's to more partying, more drinking and more eating to welcome 2006. Wishing everyone a very safe and fabulous New Year!!! Appreciate more, laugh more and say "I love you" more (and mean it!!!)
See you all next year!!! 30 weeks of Japan left?!?!?!
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Thursday, December 22, 2005
Unforgettable 25th~
I had the most incredible birthday yesterday. It was the first time in my life that I had snow on my birthday. Went to my birthday party at a restaurant up in the mountains. It was amazing, but very scary because it was snowing and the snow was building up on the road.
So, the party started at 7pm...by 8:30 the party was over because there were just too much snow on the road. It was also the first time in my life that I drove at 8km/hr. Never ever have this "lead foot" drove so slow in her life. But, for the sake of me and the two passengers in my car, the slower the better (^_^)
Funny though, from friends back home, I only received 2 birthday wishes...*sigh* My friends back home have all forgotten about me (T_T) How sad...But, nevertheless, my 25th birthday is one that I will never forget!!!
It's holiday time!! Wahey~
So, the party started at 7pm...by 8:30 the party was over because there were just too much snow on the road. It was also the first time in my life that I drove at 8km/hr. Never ever have this "lead foot" drove so slow in her life. But, for the sake of me and the two passengers in my car, the slower the better (^_^)
Funny though, from friends back home, I only received 2 birthday wishes...*sigh* My friends back home have all forgotten about me (T_T) How sad...But, nevertheless, my 25th birthday is one that I will never forget!!!
It's holiday time!! Wahey~
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
25 TODAY!!!
Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday to ME! Happy birthday to me! woohoo~ 25 years old (^_^)
First time in my life that I'll be having a "white birthday". It's snowing :) It's amazing, quite romantic actually. So nice...
First time in my life that I'll be having a "white birthday". It's snowing :) It's amazing, quite romantic actually. So nice...
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Life's too short
Life's too short to be wound up worrying about the little insignificant things in life. Treasure the ones that are most precious to you. Tell them how much you love them and how much they mean to your life. We can't live life wondering what bad or tragic things can happen to us, but we must always remember that it might happen to us...one day, unexpectedly. Life always throw us curve balls when you think it's all smooth sailing.
Why am I talking about all these? Let's just say that I had a really bad weekend. It was sort of a wake up call, to smell the roses and to look at my life and what I'm doing. Why am I worrying about the small things in life, when family and friends are the most important thing?
Men&relationships? Do they really matter that much in my life? I've not given up the hope on meeting a nice person...but I'm definitely going to stop writing about it and stop stressing about it...If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't..ey, just have to shrug my shoulders and say...oh well.
Life can play tricks on us...my dearest friends, 25 years old...so young, so much to live for.
Think before you act.
Don't smoke too much.
Don't drink too much.
NEVER EVER DRINK and DRIVE.
Tell your family you love them.
Always look towards the positive side of life.
Why am I talking about all these? Let's just say that I had a really bad weekend. It was sort of a wake up call, to smell the roses and to look at my life and what I'm doing. Why am I worrying about the small things in life, when family and friends are the most important thing?
Men&relationships? Do they really matter that much in my life? I've not given up the hope on meeting a nice person...but I'm definitely going to stop writing about it and stop stressing about it...If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't..ey, just have to shrug my shoulders and say...oh well.
Life can play tricks on us...my dearest friends, 25 years old...so young, so much to live for.
Think before you act.
Don't smoke too much.
Don't drink too much.
NEVER EVER DRINK and DRIVE.
Tell your family you love them.
Always look towards the positive side of life.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Are you ready to settle down?
Took a quiz from Cosmo and this is what it says about moi...
Are you ready to settle down?
Total Score: 8
8 - 14: Commitment-friendly chick
Here comes the ... babe. You're not desperate to lock up a commitment with a guy and don't look at your engaged friends with "Why isn't it me?" envy. Sure, you love being part of a cosy duo, but you are cool hanging solo between relationships. Your confidence (guy or no guy) gives you perspective in the dating game, says psychologist Dr Nancy Rosenbach. "You don't drop everything in your life — like your hobbies, your friends or even other men you're casually seeing — when a promising guy enters the picture." You're also careful to keep your romances in the present tense. "Your attitude is, 'Why rush? Things are great right now,'" says Rosenbach. As a result, your relationships unfold naturally and have a better chance of working out in the long run.
So true isn't it ^_^
There's a feeling of wanting to belong with somebody, but there really is no rush.
Been thinking lately of what I want in life? What do I want in life? what am I going to do next year?
Going back to OZ sounds great because I can see my family and friends, but what do I really have back there? I'll just fall back into routine. I love teaching and all, but is that what I really want to do?
Might stay in Japan for another year??? Just maybe??
Are you ready to settle down?
Total Score: 8
8 - 14: Commitment-friendly chick
Here comes the ... babe. You're not desperate to lock up a commitment with a guy and don't look at your engaged friends with "Why isn't it me?" envy. Sure, you love being part of a cosy duo, but you are cool hanging solo between relationships. Your confidence (guy or no guy) gives you perspective in the dating game, says psychologist Dr Nancy Rosenbach. "You don't drop everything in your life — like your hobbies, your friends or even other men you're casually seeing — when a promising guy enters the picture." You're also careful to keep your romances in the present tense. "Your attitude is, 'Why rush? Things are great right now,'" says Rosenbach. As a result, your relationships unfold naturally and have a better chance of working out in the long run.
So true isn't it ^_^
There's a feeling of wanting to belong with somebody, but there really is no rush.
Been thinking lately of what I want in life? What do I want in life? what am I going to do next year?
Going back to OZ sounds great because I can see my family and friends, but what do I really have back there? I'll just fall back into routine. I love teaching and all, but is that what I really want to do?
Might stay in Japan for another year??? Just maybe??
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
SnOw
It's so cold here. It really is snowing heavily. Man, why did I choose to stay here during winter vacation? But, I guess it leaves me my "alone" time. To catch up on reading, sleeping, and watching re-runs of old christmas movies, eg. Home Alone. Sounds sad, but truly it's going to be great, and you know what?! I can't wait :)
Birthday's coming up...next Wednesday, woohoo. Have decided to go to a yakitori restaurant with some friends. Actually, my English conversation class practically organised the whole thing. It's going to be fun. 25! Wow, I'm a quater of a century years old. It's still young, but somehow I feel old. Yet, I feel like I haven't achieved anything? Hm...yes, caught up between the ups and downs of life.
What am I going to do about next year? Still sitting on the fence...where do I stand? What do I do?
The snow is building up on the ground. I hate driving in the snow >_< blah...
Birthday's coming up...next Wednesday, woohoo. Have decided to go to a yakitori restaurant with some friends. Actually, my English conversation class practically organised the whole thing. It's going to be fun. 25! Wow, I'm a quater of a century years old. It's still young, but somehow I feel old. Yet, I feel like I haven't achieved anything? Hm...yes, caught up between the ups and downs of life.
What am I going to do about next year? Still sitting on the fence...where do I stand? What do I do?
The snow is building up on the ground. I hate driving in the snow >_< blah...
Friday, December 09, 2005
I'm turning 25
I'm turning 25 :) Celebrating another birthday in Winter and in Japan. This year will be quite a different experience. No longer will I be eating a cake alone in my cold, cold house, I'll be having a birthday party with some of my Japanese friends. Yatta!!! Yay :)
I gave myself a very intimate birthday present. I love it, and it's a secret ^_< So, not going to share it with you guys, but thought I'd tease you a bit just to keep you interested.
On Monday and Tuesday, Kumamoto prefecture had our Mid-year conference. Nice gathering of all the foreigners in the prefecture, along with some of our brave Japanese Teacher of English counterparts. My BRAVE JTE came along with me to join the show. She was very determined on not coming when we first got the papers. But, the big boss of the area called specific teachers to make sure they show their face at this annual thing. My JTE didn't want to come along because she thought she might get a "headache" from all that ENGLISH that we'll be speaking...Hmmm, goodness gracious, she's an English teacher...But, she did come and she did have a great time (Or so she says)
I gave myself a very intimate birthday present. I love it, and it's a secret ^_< So, not going to share it with you guys, but thought I'd tease you a bit just to keep you interested.
On Monday and Tuesday, Kumamoto prefecture had our Mid-year conference. Nice gathering of all the foreigners in the prefecture, along with some of our brave Japanese Teacher of English counterparts. My BRAVE JTE came along with me to join the show. She was very determined on not coming when we first got the papers. But, the big boss of the area called specific teachers to make sure they show their face at this annual thing. My JTE didn't want to come along because she thought she might get a "headache" from all that ENGLISH that we'll be speaking...Hmmm, goodness gracious, she's an English teacher...But, she did come and she did have a great time (Or so she says)
Thursday, November 24, 2005
One Flaw In Women...
By the time the Lord made woman,
He was into his sixth day of working overtime.
An angel appeared and said,
"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic,
have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable
and able to run on diet coke and leftovers,
have a lap that can hold four children at one time,
have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart
-and she will do everything
with only two hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way!
And that's just on the standard model?
That's too much work for one day.
Wait until tomorrow to finish."
But I won't," the Lord protested.
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart.
She already heals herself when she is sick
AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed,
"but I have also made her tough.
You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
The Lord replied,
"Not only will she be able to think,
she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something,
and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.
I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak,"
the Lord corrected,
"that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy,
her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love,
her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed.
"You are a genius, Lord.
You thought of everything!
Woman is truly amazing."
And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness,
love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
To all the great women out there...Believe in yourself and your worth ^_^
By the time the Lord made woman,
He was into his sixth day of working overtime.
An angel appeared and said,
"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic,
have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable
and able to run on diet coke and leftovers,
have a lap that can hold four children at one time,
have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart
-and she will do everything
with only two hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way!
And that's just on the standard model?
That's too much work for one day.
Wait until tomorrow to finish."
But I won't," the Lord protested.
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart.
She already heals herself when she is sick
AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed,
"but I have also made her tough.
You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
The Lord replied,
"Not only will she be able to think,
she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something,
and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.
I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak,"
the Lord corrected,
"that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy,
her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love,
her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed.
"You are a genius, Lord.
You thought of everything!
Woman is truly amazing."
And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness,
love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
To all the great women out there...Believe in yourself and your worth ^_^
Thanksgiving Dinner 23rd Nov.
I had my first ever Thanksgiving Dinner in my whole entire life last night. I don't really know why there is a Thanksgiving? To show my ignorance I'm going to say it's something about Native Indians, pilgrams and it DEFINITELY has something to do with Turkeys ^_=
Well, our little gun put on quite a feast last night, we all made an effort to bring something, and put together a great dinner. Our "Turkey" was from KFC, not really a turkey, but it's still a bird :)
Things are going much better now. No more heartaches, headaches, or any aches...except that I am SO sleepy...All the time. I feel like I have to be in bed all the time or otherwise I will faint >_< Not good at all. Winter, why can't we be like the bears and hibernate during the cold season?!
I received an email from a very, very special person the other day. He was expressing his concerns about me and about my previous problems. He wrote and I think it's so very true ...
"...life is always throwing us curve balls which get us bamboozled from time to time, but life is like that. Often times when we think that our journey is chartered something comes along and knocks us off course. Those things happen at all stages in our life. Sometimes it is for the better, sometimes not, but we learn to manage and roll with the punches..."
At different times in life we'll always receive an unexpected email from an unexpected friend that will mean the world and make our day. These couple of days has been like that. I am ever so lucky to have great friends in my life.
Well, our little gun put on quite a feast last night, we all made an effort to bring something, and put together a great dinner. Our "Turkey" was from KFC, not really a turkey, but it's still a bird :)
Things are going much better now. No more heartaches, headaches, or any aches...except that I am SO sleepy...All the time. I feel like I have to be in bed all the time or otherwise I will faint >_< Not good at all. Winter, why can't we be like the bears and hibernate during the cold season?!
I received an email from a very, very special person the other day. He was expressing his concerns about me and about my previous problems. He wrote and I think it's so very true ...
"...life is always throwing us curve balls which get us bamboozled from time to time, but life is like that. Often times when we think that our journey is chartered something comes along and knocks us off course. Those things happen at all stages in our life. Sometimes it is for the better, sometimes not, but we learn to manage and roll with the punches..."
At different times in life we'll always receive an unexpected email from an unexpected friend that will mean the world and make our day. These couple of days has been like that. I am ever so lucky to have great friends in my life.
Friday, November 18, 2005
Funny how feelings and emotions can just come and go...I spoke to a few friends about my feelings and now I'm fine. ^^" Back to my normal self again.
When those down phases cross your path, you really just have to face it and deal with it. In the end, it is you who chooses your own path, and lead your own life.
I can choose to be happy, or I can choose to be miserable and let something so insignificant hurt me and bother me. Therefore, I have chosen to let it go.
Silly really, because we all need to move on. I will not settle for second best, nor will I choose to be second best.
On another note, I have a BRAND NEW CAR!!! Yep, yep, my town has provided me with yet another brand new car. It's silver and when I got it yesterday it only had 15km on it and the plastic was still over the seat covers. Ha!~ so excited :)
Can't believe it's the weekend again. Days just seem to go by in a flash. It'll be the end of the year soon...what will my new year's resolution be for 2006?
When those down phases cross your path, you really just have to face it and deal with it. In the end, it is you who chooses your own path, and lead your own life.
I can choose to be happy, or I can choose to be miserable and let something so insignificant hurt me and bother me. Therefore, I have chosen to let it go.
Silly really, because we all need to move on. I will not settle for second best, nor will I choose to be second best.
On another note, I have a BRAND NEW CAR!!! Yep, yep, my town has provided me with yet another brand new car. It's silver and when I got it yesterday it only had 15km on it and the plastic was still over the seat covers. Ha!~ so excited :)
Can't believe it's the weekend again. Days just seem to go by in a flash. It'll be the end of the year soon...what will my new year's resolution be for 2006?
Thursday, November 17, 2005
After a while...
After a while you learn
the subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn that love doesn't mean possession
and company doesn't mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts
and presents aren't promises
and you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of an adult not the grief of a child.
And you learn to build your roads today
because tomorrows ground is too uncertain for plans
and futures have ways of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns
if you get too much
so you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
that you really are strong
and you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn...
Veronica A. Shoffstall
After a while you learn
the subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn that love doesn't mean possession
and company doesn't mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts
and presents aren't promises
and you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of an adult not the grief of a child.
And you learn to build your roads today
because tomorrows ground is too uncertain for plans
and futures have ways of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns
if you get too much
so you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
that you really are strong
and you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn...
Veronica A. Shoffstall
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
I'm Back~
I'm back!!! From a short trip to Taiwan to see my beautiful cousin Celeste get married to a wonderful guy. The wedding was magnificent. She was so pretty, just like a princess. I had an amazing time, catching up with family and friends, and especially my sister. I miss them so much already. My little nephew Derek (cousin's son) he's so adorable, I love him so much...He's the sweetest 4 year old I've ever met. Photos will be posted later.
My other cousin Johnny (SUFFA) is releasing an album in Taiwan with a group named MACHI. Johnny's amazing, finally achieving his dream and goal. I wish him every success.
Came home to an empty house yesterday, mixed feelings when I walked into my house. The feeling of peace and quiet (really missed that when I was in Taiwan) but at the same time, lonliness...After spending a week with family constantly around and talking it was definitely very quiet.
I want to write more about my time in Taiwan but there's something else that's more pressing in my mind.
MB is seeing somebody. It was such a conicidence that I asked him about it when he emailed me the previous day to tell me about it. Guess we're telepathetic (telepathic). To hear that the person you love (loved? - I don't think it's past tense) is seeing somebody it hurts...of course it does, but there's no need for apologies because what's done is done. Do I love him? Yes, I do. Do I miss him, very much so. But, circumstances does not allow it to be. I can't breathe...it's suffocating. Have I gotten over him? In a way I have, but in a way there's always that idea of "what if..." but we can't live life thinking about the "what ifs". Oh my god...I need a hug, I need someone to say that everything will be alright, I want to scream and let out all the furstration...and maybe then I will be ok. I want to hibernate and wait for spring to come.
When I was in Taiwan the main question that was directed at me was..."so, when are you getting married?" Then I would reply that I don't have a boyfriend, and then they'll say "What!! You've broken up with your boyfriend again?" It's not like I've had plenty..and it was never me who initiates these breakups.
Spoke to mum last night and she said that my daddy was wondering when it's his turn to hold his grandchild. Sorry daddy, not for a while yet.
Well, back to Mizukami. It's so cold in Japan. I'm lonely.
My other cousin Johnny (SUFFA) is releasing an album in Taiwan with a group named MACHI. Johnny's amazing, finally achieving his dream and goal. I wish him every success.
Came home to an empty house yesterday, mixed feelings when I walked into my house. The feeling of peace and quiet (really missed that when I was in Taiwan) but at the same time, lonliness...After spending a week with family constantly around and talking it was definitely very quiet.
I want to write more about my time in Taiwan but there's something else that's more pressing in my mind.
MB is seeing somebody. It was such a conicidence that I asked him about it when he emailed me the previous day to tell me about it. Guess we're telepathetic (telepathic). To hear that the person you love (loved? - I don't think it's past tense) is seeing somebody it hurts...of course it does, but there's no need for apologies because what's done is done. Do I love him? Yes, I do. Do I miss him, very much so. But, circumstances does not allow it to be. I can't breathe...it's suffocating. Have I gotten over him? In a way I have, but in a way there's always that idea of "what if..." but we can't live life thinking about the "what ifs". Oh my god...I need a hug, I need someone to say that everything will be alright, I want to scream and let out all the furstration...and maybe then I will be ok. I want to hibernate and wait for spring to come.
When I was in Taiwan the main question that was directed at me was..."so, when are you getting married?" Then I would reply that I don't have a boyfriend, and then they'll say "What!! You've broken up with your boyfriend again?" It's not like I've had plenty..and it was never me who initiates these breakups.
Spoke to mum last night and she said that my daddy was wondering when it's his turn to hold his grandchild. Sorry daddy, not for a while yet.
Well, back to Mizukami. It's so cold in Japan. I'm lonely.
Friday, November 04, 2005
If you had one wish what will it be? I was sitting with my studetnts having school lunch and they were saying if they had one wish, it would be for time to stop. The kids are so flat out lately that 24hours are not enough for them.
If I had one wish what will it be? Right now, I don't know. I'm so confused and torn between the idea of going home, or otherwise staying in Japan for another year. I thought I was ready and have sort of semi-made up my mind about leaving in July next year. But, right now, I'm not too sure...
I've been having anxiety attacks lately. Friends in Japan have asked me over and over again not to go back home, but Australia is my home in the end. My family and friends are there. My students have asked me not to go back to Australia. They said they need me. A converstaion which took place on Wednesday goes like this...
Mami (yr6 student + dance group member) "Vicky sensei, will you be in Sakura dance group next year?"
Vicky "Yeah, I will, until July next year."
Mami "oh, so you'll go back to Sydney?"
Vicky " Yeah, I'm going back to Sydney in July."
Mami "But you'll come back on Tuesdays and Thursdays when we have practice right?"
Vicky "Um...I don't think so, it'll be very expensive."
Mami "oh ok, then you'll be back when we have to perform right?"
Vicky "Mami, I don't think so...I don't think I can come back to Mizukami just for dancing..."
Broke my heart, sweet girl. They're all sweet like that. I don't think they get the concept of someone leaving...for good. Then received a mail from one of the ladies that I went on a trip with, and she wrote, we have to go on another trip before you leave to go back to Australia.
The problem is...do I want to go back to Australia? I'm confused???
If you had a guy that you liked, what do you do?
Do you sit and wait for something to happen?
Do you call him?
Do you message him?
Do you do something about it?
...even when you know nothing will come out of it
...even when all the odds are against it
...even when you know full well, that the two of you are from different sides of the world, from different circles of life.
So confused. I think I'm just causing trouble for myself...need some drama in my life or something, thus this stupid fantasy romance thing that I've conjured up in my mind. Wahey~
If I had one wish what will it be? Right now, I don't know. I'm so confused and torn between the idea of going home, or otherwise staying in Japan for another year. I thought I was ready and have sort of semi-made up my mind about leaving in July next year. But, right now, I'm not too sure...
I've been having anxiety attacks lately. Friends in Japan have asked me over and over again not to go back home, but Australia is my home in the end. My family and friends are there. My students have asked me not to go back to Australia. They said they need me. A converstaion which took place on Wednesday goes like this...
Mami (yr6 student + dance group member) "Vicky sensei, will you be in Sakura dance group next year?"
Vicky "Yeah, I will, until July next year."
Mami "oh, so you'll go back to Sydney?"
Vicky " Yeah, I'm going back to Sydney in July."
Mami "But you'll come back on Tuesdays and Thursdays when we have practice right?"
Vicky "Um...I don't think so, it'll be very expensive."
Mami "oh ok, then you'll be back when we have to perform right?"
Vicky "Mami, I don't think so...I don't think I can come back to Mizukami just for dancing..."
Broke my heart, sweet girl. They're all sweet like that. I don't think they get the concept of someone leaving...for good. Then received a mail from one of the ladies that I went on a trip with, and she wrote, we have to go on another trip before you leave to go back to Australia.
The problem is...do I want to go back to Australia? I'm confused???
If you had a guy that you liked, what do you do?
Do you sit and wait for something to happen?
Do you call him?
Do you message him?
Do you do something about it?
...even when you know nothing will come out of it
...even when all the odds are against it
...even when you know full well, that the two of you are from different sides of the world, from different circles of life.
So confused. I think I'm just causing trouble for myself...need some drama in my life or something, thus this stupid fantasy romance thing that I've conjured up in my mind. Wahey~
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Shooting Star ****
I saw my first shooting star on Halloween. It was amazing. I was with Ayami. We were coming home after getting a horror movie (to match the Halloween theme) and dinner. We were walking to my house and we were looking up at the sky because it was such a beautiful clear night, and then all of a sudden, there it was...the shooting star, crossing the dark, night sky. So romantic. We've decided to go sky watching on New Years Day :) It will be freezing, but fun nonetheless.
Am heading to Taiwan next Wednesday. My cousin, Celeste is getting married. Can't wait, can't wait. Will only be back for a week, but still I get to see family.
It's so cold in Mizukami.
Am heading to Taiwan next Wednesday. My cousin, Celeste is getting married. Can't wait, can't wait. Will only be back for a week, but still I get to see family.
It's so cold in Mizukami.
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Over the weekend I went away with my two mums. The trip was great. I love Japan, the pure beauty of Japanese nature is breath taking. The onsen was great, the food was delicious. Overall a fabulous time.
I need to cut my hair. I want to cut my hair. I can't wait to go and cut my hair...tomorrow? Or Saturday...should I cut my hair on Saturday right before my third wedding here...Maybe?! But I'm dying to get my hair cut so I will do it.
I need to cut my hair. I want to cut my hair. I can't wait to go and cut my hair...tomorrow? Or Saturday...should I cut my hair on Saturday right before my third wedding here...Maybe?! But I'm dying to get my hair cut so I will do it.
Friday, October 21, 2005
Why are we afraid of the dark? Like the way we are afraid of the unknown? I went out walking last night, around 6:30pm. It was dark and cold. But, I loved it! The serenity and calmness of the quiet streets. The stars twinkling above, the fresh wind blowing in my face. Felt so free and relaxed. I was so happy just to be...
Autumn/Winter has definitely made its way to Japan. The temperature has dropped dramatically over these past few days. I'm going to have to redecorate my house and bring out the rugs and the kotatsu (warm table).
Shops are bringing out their xmas decorations and selling xmas cards...wow, another year. Time just seems to fly. What should I do for my xmas break?
It's the weekend again, I'm going on a trip with two of my students mothers. They're around 40something years old. They can't speak English, and I can't speak Japanese. It'll be an interesting trip for sure! We're going on an Onsen trip (Hot Springs) So, we'll be onsen hopping instead of bar hopping. Looking forward to it ^_^ I'll try and take some pics of us in the onsen..hehee...
Autumn/Winter has definitely made its way to Japan. The temperature has dropped dramatically over these past few days. I'm going to have to redecorate my house and bring out the rugs and the kotatsu (warm table).
Shops are bringing out their xmas decorations and selling xmas cards...wow, another year. Time just seems to fly. What should I do for my xmas break?
It's the weekend again, I'm going on a trip with two of my students mothers. They're around 40something years old. They can't speak English, and I can't speak Japanese. It'll be an interesting trip for sure! We're going on an Onsen trip (Hot Springs) So, we'll be onsen hopping instead of bar hopping. Looking forward to it ^_^ I'll try and take some pics of us in the onsen..hehee...
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Morning Glory
Was in class yesterday with my year 7 elective class. Which consisted of three boys and five girls. We were searching for words in the dictionary. The teacher had them find a word that they liked and they were to spell it out and the rest of the class was to find out what it means.
The girls, sensibly chose words like, Snoopy, Charlie Brown, Humpty Dumpty (don't know why, go figure) And then, this boy started spelling out this word M.O.R.N.I.N.G G.L.O.R.Y , and I just couldn't help but giggle...The real meaning is that it's a plant's name. But, in our colloquial term, it means something else. Much unsuitable in a classroom scenario. So, that was the highlight of my day, watching kids searching for Morning Glory.
Today, the students had their mid-term exams. One of the question in the test for Yr9. was "What makes you sad?" I was marking the papers and I came across this answer "..Nothing, I'm always happy." Great answer, I would've given him a tick for being so imaginative and answering it with proper grammar and all..but no, it has to be one of those text-book answers to be correct. Sorry, kiddo. No wonder the students hates English...don't blame them.
The girls, sensibly chose words like, Snoopy, Charlie Brown, Humpty Dumpty (don't know why, go figure) And then, this boy started spelling out this word M.O.R.N.I.N.G G.L.O.R.Y , and I just couldn't help but giggle...The real meaning is that it's a plant's name. But, in our colloquial term, it means something else. Much unsuitable in a classroom scenario. So, that was the highlight of my day, watching kids searching for Morning Glory.
Today, the students had their mid-term exams. One of the question in the test for Yr9. was "What makes you sad?" I was marking the papers and I came across this answer "..Nothing, I'm always happy." Great answer, I would've given him a tick for being so imaginative and answering it with proper grammar and all..but no, it has to be one of those text-book answers to be correct. Sorry, kiddo. No wonder the students hates English...don't blame them.
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Japanese Wedding 8th October
Went to another wedding on Saturday. It was different to the first one. The layout of the hall was different. Yuuko and Hiroyuki were a bit older, so the feeling of this wedding had more of an adult, family feel to it. I liked it. I thought it was very warm. The gift we received from the newlyweds were a champagne glass with our names engraved on it. Japanese being Japanese can't pronounce the "L" and the "R" sound in English...which apparently made it's way to the champagne glass as well...I'm sorry daddy, but I'm no longer a LEE but a REE...Vicky REE...hmmm. But, it's the thought that counts right (^_=)
The wedding started at 1:30. So, late lunch mixed with afternoon of drinking ;) When the FIRST party ended at 4pm, we went to the second party. A more informal party with more food and even more ALCOHOL. The second party started from 5pm. There were only a handful of people, mostly the young ones (the olds have their own second parties) We were there drinking and eating, and they were trying to hook me up with the guy from my office (yet again) turns out he does have a girlfriend afterall!!! Who can you believe now in this day and age...
Anyways, went to the third party, which was at a karaoke place, stayed for an hour and was about to call it a night, when Ayami calls and asks me to go to the party that she's at with her and her friends. So, showed up at my forth party for the evening, and just chatted and met some really nice young people. My night ended at 12:00 midnight, just like Cinderella (^_^)
The wedding started at 1:30. So, late lunch mixed with afternoon of drinking ;) When the FIRST party ended at 4pm, we went to the second party. A more informal party with more food and even more ALCOHOL. The second party started from 5pm. There were only a handful of people, mostly the young ones (the olds have their own second parties) We were there drinking and eating, and they were trying to hook me up with the guy from my office (yet again) turns out he does have a girlfriend afterall!!! Who can you believe now in this day and age...
Anyways, went to the third party, which was at a karaoke place, stayed for an hour and was about to call it a night, when Ayami calls and asks me to go to the party that she's at with her and her friends. So, showed up at my forth party for the evening, and just chatted and met some really nice young people. My night ended at 12:00 midnight, just like Cinderella (^_^)
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
Monday, October 03, 2005
FuN FuN FuN!!!
I am so so tired after my weekend, but I had such a fantastic time!
Friday I went to a friend's house. Harumi is a lady that's mum's age and she comes to my english conversation class. She has two children, Mayumi, who is 29 and Youhei, who is 27. Mayumi just had a baby boy a month ago, so I went to visit them. Baby Shinosuke is so tiny, but very cute. I stayed over for dinner at her house, the whole family was there. It felt so good to have a family dinner. We were laughing and chatting, it felt so nice to belong...the dad just kept on saying to me, come over and have dinner anytime. Then Harumi showed me Mayumi&Youhei's baby books. The books smelt old, but it contained all the firsts...First time they rolled over, firt time they sat up, first step they took. All parents are the same, they're proud of their children and they want the best for them...But, why is it that somewhere along the line this kind of love change? Some parents become distant and they stop talking to their kids, is it because of high expectaions? I don't know, anyways, I'm suppose to be talking about my weekend, sorry for the short diversion.
So, Friday was great!!! Will be going back to their house next week. Looking forward to the BBQ they're preparing :)
Saturday. I went rafting!!! It was AMAZING!!! It felt like going down the Snowy River Rampage at Australia's Wonderland, only 10000 times BETTER!
Our meeting time was at 10am. I made my way to Niki's house at 8:30 in the morning, then we went to pick up Dave. After we got Dave, we drove to meet my three girlfriends Minako, Keiko and Chikako who drove all the way from the city to come rafting with a bunch of foreigners. We met up with them then went to meet the rest of the smelly gaijins. We all got together pretty much around 10, and then drove to our rafting company.
When we got there we got suited up in wet suits, lifejackets, helmets and shoes. The weather was FABULOUS for our fun in the water, but we were melting in our wetsuit. After the 16 of us got ready, we took a paddle and made our way to the river.
We had three boats. Dave, Phil, Minako, Keiko, Chikako and I were in one boat, along with our cool rafting guide Inachi san. We went down the river in our boat and then everyone started pulling each other into the water...we swam for a while and then climbed back in and then paddled down the rapids.
Along the way "our team" developed a slogan, so whenever we did something cool, or attacked the other boats, we'd all put our paddles up high and say "un-niya"...um, yes, it's a Japanese word, I think the girls said it's suppose to mean "no", but it's a cute Jap girly thing, so u have to put your hand to one side and say "un-niya" and sort of extend the 'niya' bit. It was cute?! It was definitely funny when two big gaijin boys do it :p
So, along we went down the Kuma river, until our guides stopped the boats and said it was time for a dive. The rocks were 5m/7m high. I made my way up, but I couldn't jump. It was scary, so I pondered and pondered, but decided against it in the end. So, being the scaredy cat that I am, instead of jumping down (which would've been the easiest way) I opted to climb back down the way I came. Ha! But, I did swing off the swing when we stopped for our next big adventure v(^_^)v
Our lunch was also very delicious. We had a great BBQ, re-fill drinks and ice-cream. After lunch we made our way down the rapids again. At this point, we decided to mix up the teams and go mingle with others. So, that's exactly what we did.
Our new rafting guide was a hottie. At this point, the rapids were beginning to get a little bit faster, so Yuya (hot guide) told us if we get to scared just to grab onto the rope. Minako and I were the ones at the front, it was a scary experience because unexpectedly I fell into the river, it was so funny and scary at the same time. But I live to tell the tale.
Our trip ended at around 4pm in the afternoon, we got back to base camp and hopped into the onsen. It was gooood. Then went to dinner and the others had alot to drink. I was home by 10:00 because the following day was my elementray schools' sports festival.
Sunday. Bright and ealry (8:20) I went to Yuyama ES. The sports festival like all other festivals starts with all the formalities such as opening of the ceremony, speeches, raising of the flags, morning stretches, and then the closing of the opeing ceremony. During that time I was chatting with Ayami and Ezaki, so didn't really listen to any speeches, hehee..but we did do our morning stretches.
The races then started, and I was making the rounds chatting to different kids, mums and dads, it was a great social event. This year all the areas had uniforms. It was actually quite impressive. Was sitting down and chatting to some men that I knew and all of a sudden they were asking me what I was doing at night and that I should go to their drinking party to celebrate, I thought they were joking, so I said yeah ok, but I had made plans to go out to dinner with another girlfriend. So that was that and I thought they'd forget about it. Anyways, I ran in a race in Yuyama, and watched and chatted some more. Lunchtime came, so I went to have lunch with Hamakawa family (Ayami's family) they're like my second family (I have alot of second families, but I love my family the most :)) Lunch was great!! But, I had to make my way down to Iwano, my second school for the day.
Got to Iwano around 1pm. Saw my host mum and helped her area out in doing a performance in front of everyone, that was funny. Everyone saw me and they had a great laugh, so did I! This year I participated in alot of events with my own area. Which felt good, because it felt like I belonged, so that was really nice :) The area that I live in actually came first out of everyone this year, so that was fun :)
The day goes on, see what I mean about a busy weekend...Sports day went on until 3:30, after some more races and dancing. Helped packed up the tents and chairs and this and that. Went home to get ready for dinner with Yuiko at 5:30.
Met Yuiko at her house at 5:30 and went to dinner with her. During dinner I get a phone call from Ayami, she asked me to go to Kitame's celebration party. My goodness, so I said I'll be there around 7:30. Yuiko and I had a great time eating and chatting. Man, I'm 5 years older than her, so didn't feel like it.
Went to Kitame's party, they were SO happy to see me there. I was happy to be there too. Again, like all other parties, a second party was a must. Ended up at Sakura, a yakitori restaurant. They drank, ate and sang until late into the night. I couldn't handle it anymore, so I called it quits about 10:30. Long long weekend, now I have bags unders my eyes. Sleepy ah!
This coming weekend will be a long weekend, and it will be another LONG weekend....when am I going to get some sleep...Friend's wedding, dance festival, going to the city...ah la la. I need sleep.
Friday I went to a friend's house. Harumi is a lady that's mum's age and she comes to my english conversation class. She has two children, Mayumi, who is 29 and Youhei, who is 27. Mayumi just had a baby boy a month ago, so I went to visit them. Baby Shinosuke is so tiny, but very cute. I stayed over for dinner at her house, the whole family was there. It felt so good to have a family dinner. We were laughing and chatting, it felt so nice to belong...the dad just kept on saying to me, come over and have dinner anytime. Then Harumi showed me Mayumi&Youhei's baby books. The books smelt old, but it contained all the firsts...First time they rolled over, firt time they sat up, first step they took. All parents are the same, they're proud of their children and they want the best for them...But, why is it that somewhere along the line this kind of love change? Some parents become distant and they stop talking to their kids, is it because of high expectaions? I don't know, anyways, I'm suppose to be talking about my weekend, sorry for the short diversion.
So, Friday was great!!! Will be going back to their house next week. Looking forward to the BBQ they're preparing :)
Saturday. I went rafting!!! It was AMAZING!!! It felt like going down the Snowy River Rampage at Australia's Wonderland, only 10000 times BETTER!
Our meeting time was at 10am. I made my way to Niki's house at 8:30 in the morning, then we went to pick up Dave. After we got Dave, we drove to meet my three girlfriends Minako, Keiko and Chikako who drove all the way from the city to come rafting with a bunch of foreigners. We met up with them then went to meet the rest of the smelly gaijins. We all got together pretty much around 10, and then drove to our rafting company.
When we got there we got suited up in wet suits, lifejackets, helmets and shoes. The weather was FABULOUS for our fun in the water, but we were melting in our wetsuit. After the 16 of us got ready, we took a paddle and made our way to the river.
We had three boats. Dave, Phil, Minako, Keiko, Chikako and I were in one boat, along with our cool rafting guide Inachi san. We went down the river in our boat and then everyone started pulling each other into the water...we swam for a while and then climbed back in and then paddled down the rapids.
Along the way "our team" developed a slogan, so whenever we did something cool, or attacked the other boats, we'd all put our paddles up high and say "un-niya"...um, yes, it's a Japanese word, I think the girls said it's suppose to mean "no", but it's a cute Jap girly thing, so u have to put your hand to one side and say "un-niya" and sort of extend the 'niya' bit. It was cute?! It was definitely funny when two big gaijin boys do it :p
So, along we went down the Kuma river, until our guides stopped the boats and said it was time for a dive. The rocks were 5m/7m high. I made my way up, but I couldn't jump. It was scary, so I pondered and pondered, but decided against it in the end. So, being the scaredy cat that I am, instead of jumping down (which would've been the easiest way) I opted to climb back down the way I came. Ha! But, I did swing off the swing when we stopped for our next big adventure v(^_^)v
Our lunch was also very delicious. We had a great BBQ, re-fill drinks and ice-cream. After lunch we made our way down the rapids again. At this point, we decided to mix up the teams and go mingle with others. So, that's exactly what we did.
Our new rafting guide was a hottie. At this point, the rapids were beginning to get a little bit faster, so Yuya (hot guide) told us if we get to scared just to grab onto the rope. Minako and I were the ones at the front, it was a scary experience because unexpectedly I fell into the river, it was so funny and scary at the same time. But I live to tell the tale.
Our trip ended at around 4pm in the afternoon, we got back to base camp and hopped into the onsen. It was gooood. Then went to dinner and the others had alot to drink. I was home by 10:00 because the following day was my elementray schools' sports festival.
Sunday. Bright and ealry (8:20) I went to Yuyama ES. The sports festival like all other festivals starts with all the formalities such as opening of the ceremony, speeches, raising of the flags, morning stretches, and then the closing of the opeing ceremony. During that time I was chatting with Ayami and Ezaki, so didn't really listen to any speeches, hehee..but we did do our morning stretches.
The races then started, and I was making the rounds chatting to different kids, mums and dads, it was a great social event. This year all the areas had uniforms. It was actually quite impressive. Was sitting down and chatting to some men that I knew and all of a sudden they were asking me what I was doing at night and that I should go to their drinking party to celebrate, I thought they were joking, so I said yeah ok, but I had made plans to go out to dinner with another girlfriend. So that was that and I thought they'd forget about it. Anyways, I ran in a race in Yuyama, and watched and chatted some more. Lunchtime came, so I went to have lunch with Hamakawa family (Ayami's family) they're like my second family (I have alot of second families, but I love my family the most :)) Lunch was great!! But, I had to make my way down to Iwano, my second school for the day.
Got to Iwano around 1pm. Saw my host mum and helped her area out in doing a performance in front of everyone, that was funny. Everyone saw me and they had a great laugh, so did I! This year I participated in alot of events with my own area. Which felt good, because it felt like I belonged, so that was really nice :) The area that I live in actually came first out of everyone this year, so that was fun :)
The day goes on, see what I mean about a busy weekend...Sports day went on until 3:30, after some more races and dancing. Helped packed up the tents and chairs and this and that. Went home to get ready for dinner with Yuiko at 5:30.
Met Yuiko at her house at 5:30 and went to dinner with her. During dinner I get a phone call from Ayami, she asked me to go to Kitame's celebration party. My goodness, so I said I'll be there around 7:30. Yuiko and I had a great time eating and chatting. Man, I'm 5 years older than her, so didn't feel like it.
Went to Kitame's party, they were SO happy to see me there. I was happy to be there too. Again, like all other parties, a second party was a must. Ended up at Sakura, a yakitori restaurant. They drank, ate and sang until late into the night. I couldn't handle it anymore, so I called it quits about 10:30. Long long weekend, now I have bags unders my eyes. Sleepy ah!
This coming weekend will be a long weekend, and it will be another LONG weekend....when am I going to get some sleep...Friend's wedding, dance festival, going to the city...ah la la. I need sleep.
Thursday, September 22, 2005
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